Love Me, Firework

My lovely and faithful readers,

I'm gonna start this off by getting you to listen to this song and to pay close attention to the lyrics:

Unless you skipped the video, at this point you can guess what I am about to talk about: self-love. Self-love is a concept that most of us may be familiar with but often take for granted with regard to its importance. In the scriptures we are taught to be humble, selfless, submissive, meek, fearing of God, secretive about our good works, and non-judgmental. Some of us apply these things to such an extreme that we lose respect for ourselves, and we eventually forget to love ourselves.

One evening I was meeting with the employment specialist and we were working on my resume. Because it was skills-based, my job was to list all my qualifications as an HR person. That was a challenging assignment, and I told him straight-up how I felt about myself and expressed my thoughts. After telling me he wanted to spray water on me like he does to his cat, he proceeded to say many inspired things and I could tell he was moved by the spirit as he did so. I really felt the spirit and came to the conclusion that there was so much more to me than I knew.

He challenged me to come up with a list of qualities I had that made be eligible to land an HR position. I did as he asked. As I did so, I just felt so much genuine, Christlike love for myself. The minute I decided to stop focusing on the mistakes I’ve made, my bad habits, my failures, and my weaknesses, and allowed myself to remember the good things I’ve done, the moments where I chose righteousness over temporal pleasure, the moments I served others and made someone feel special, or the moments I blew peoples’ minds, I was able to see my qualities.

It's okay to love yourself. Scratch that -- it's ESSENTIAL that we love ourselves. Yet, some of us don't. Why? I've come up with 3 reasons:

1. Some of us try so hard to please others, we forget about ourselves to the point where we let them walk all over us.
   
   Yes, we should be selfless and put others' needs above our own. But too much of a good thing can lead to the neglect of other good things. In other words, if it gets to the point where "serving" others requires giving up important things like your values, those people you're trying to please are not worth your efforts -- not even your Mr. or Mrs. Right. Why? He/she would never require that from you, because they will not only love you and accept you for who you are, but they will also expect you to love yourself. The thought of you not loving yourself would be incomprehensible to them.
   
   My healthiest, longest friendships were ones where those friends not only made me feel good about myself, but also encouraged me to do so. Not loving myself is unacceptable to those friends. Think of a friend, a sibling, or anyone else who you love. When you truly love that person, you can't help but admire their qualities and will do anything to make them see those qualities and encourage them to continue to develop more of them.
   
   So, don't be afraid to cut off those people who make you feel less about yourself, and surround yourself with people who truly love you and want you to feel the same about yourself. Why? Because, you are amazing. You're a child of God who has placed in you divine qualities you have yet to discover. And if a person can't see your potential or your qualities, they're not worth your time and you are better off without them.
   
   
   
    
2. Some of us let the cruel things people do or say to us define the way we feel about ourselves. 
   
   This is a very common mistake (emphasis on mistake). Never let the way people treat you define the way you feel about yourself. You need to love yourself enough so that when people mistreat you, it can't hurt you. Never give these people that power or privilege, because they obviously don't deserve it. Sure, it sucks when people go around talking trash about you and people believe and side with them. I've been there. But trust me: see that as an opportunity to realize who your true friends are.
   
   Develop emotional independence. Or in other words, never give someone the remote control to your emotions. Be so emotionally independent that when someone says cruel things to you, betrays you, and causes some other form of harm to you, you won't let it get to you. Is that possible? Yes. Because when you love yourself, you know the difference between being a low person and a genuine person. And you know that it takes a low person to go out of their way to put others down.
   
   When you love yourself, you won't feel the need to get even, or even demand that respect out of them. You may argue that you should stand up for yourself, but I have learned that, not spending a second of your time or energy on low people, is the best form of standing up for yourself. It shows that it doesn't get to you and that they're so low, they're not worth getting back at. When you love yourself, you don't get upset; rather, you'll be genuinely kind and pray for them in return. (Hence turning the other cheek). When you love yourself, things like that don't hurt you because you know none of it is true.
   
   
   
   
   We make the mistake of wanting to prove to others that those negative things they may think about us aren't true. But you know what I learned? If you believe in something and know it to be true with all your heart, it really doesn't matter what others think on that regard. You won't feel like you need to defend it or prove it because if it is true, people will eventually see that. And if they don't, obviously they catch on slow, and if you're like me who doesn't have patience with stupid people, we can both agree they are not worth your time. Jesus himself wasn't all upset that people thought He had a devil in Him; He was upset that people didn't follow Him because He knew there'd be spiritual consequences for that, but He didn't run around begging people to listen to His side of the story or any of that crap we do.
   
   
3. Similar to the second reason, some of us lack faith for whatever reason and as a result refuse to love ourselves.
   
   All of us go through trials. They suck. I am NOT and will probably never be one of those people who thank God for trials, because I'm not grateful for them. However, I am grateful for His help and His love through it all, and for what I could learn from them. I look back on some trials I went through and still don't understand why I was given them or what I could learn from them. But, some of them are there just to teach you how patient you can be, or how kind and forgiving you are capable of being, or how faithful to God you are. That is the point I am trying to make: if you are given a trial, don't lose faith and instead, see this as an opportunity to see yourself the way God sees you.
   
   When we lose faith, we don't understand how much God loves us. When we understand how much God loves us, we can't help but love ourselves. Ever had that experience where we feel God's love for someone so strongly that we can't help but love that person ourselves? (Yeah, so when you're struggling to get along with someone, ask God to help you feel His love for them and that should do the trick.) So, why can't we have that experience for us? Why can't we, when feeling God's love for us, feel that way about ourselves too?
   
   Faith is a principle of action. When you have faith in yourself, you do the things you're supposed to do to get to your divine potential. If you love and believe in yourself, you see the end-goal and you endure. You do what you can to reach that goal and nothing can stop you.

Ever wondered what makes a BA a BA? It's their confidence and self-respect. Ever noticed in scenes where the villain tries to insult or hurt the BA, the BA confidently makes a witty sarcastic remark or just walks away? Notice their indifferent expressions? Be that BA.

Story time:

"There was once a bunch of tiny frogs, who arranged a running competition. The goal was to reach the top of a very high tower. A big crowd gathered around the tower to see the race and cheer on the contestants.

The race began…

No one in the crowd really believed that the tiny frogs would reach the top of the tower. They shouted, “Oh, way too difficult!!! They will NEVER make it to the top” and “Not a chance. The tower is too high”.

The tiny frogs began collapsing, one by one except for those who, in a fresh tempo, were climbing higher and higher….

The crowd continued to yell, “It’s too difficult! No one will make it!”

More tiny frogs got tired and gave up… But one continued higher and higher. This one wouldn’t give up! And he reached the top.

Everyone wanted to know how this one frog managed such a great feat.

His secret? This little frog was deaf!!

The wisdom of this story is:

Ignore the pessimism of others. It can take your dreams from you. Stay positive."

All of us have different qualities, attributes, and talents. But moreover, all of us have that je ne sais quoi. Each and every one of us have that special and unique something about us that set us apart from everyone. It's a matter of discovering it.

One more Katy song to whose lyrics I will request your attention:

Be you. Love that person you truly are, and many positive results will come from it. Because honestly, when we are being hard on ourselves, we are disobeying the Lord. True story! How? I've come up with five ways:

Stay tuned for next week's post and you'll know...

The Little Things

Hey kids!

I haven't written a nice long post in forever... I was in Utah for almost two weeks and didn't really have time to be inspired. Before that I was busy with finals, so you can guess where inspiration went. I have a friend who's a writer himself and said he can write even when he's not inspired (I need to learn that)! I love writing so much.. I just lack the creativity and the 'sudden rush of a million thoughts' moment sometimes. Luckily, however, I've got a bunch of posts on inventory here that were waiting to be finished up. I picked this one: my bucket list! :) I started writing it right after my 22nd birthday!

I love travelling, so that's my first category. As an ADHD, I get bored really easily. I just want to go out and explore what's out there. I don't wanna be one of those narrow-minded people who stay in their countries for the rest of their lives because they lacked that curiosity. Man, human beings like me are part of completely different cultures than mine. It's so fascinating and I just want to keep learning and exploring. I'm super open to learning new cultures, trying new foods, and going to different places. The following are some places I'd like to go, but there's tonnes more that I would love to explore.

1. Greece: Don't judge me, but Mamma Mia was what sparked my interest. Their crystal blue waters, history, landscapes, and architecture are all so unique it's fascinating. I want to see it with my own eyes.
2. Paris: I've been there a couple times as a kid living in Switzerland, and I remember it. However, I didn't appreciate it. There's so much sight-seeing to do there that I used to find super tiring and boring as a kid. You could be in Paris for 3 months and that probably still wouldn't be enough time to see everything Paris has to show you!
3. Rome: A lot of our culture and education (in my case, language as well) is influenced by the Romans. Why not explore my roots?
4. Egypt: The Ancient Egyptians are probably the most fascinating topic I studied in high school. I'd love to see a mummy, pyramids, and learn more about their history by visiting. 
5. African safari: I love animals, wildlife, and hot weather. 
6. Hawaii: I've been to Puerto Vallarta, Cancun, and tonnes of Brazilian beaches. I love beaches and tropical places. Hawaii seems like a neat place to go. Why not?
7. Tokyo: I'm half-Japanese and it's a shame that I don't know my ancestors' culture as well as I should. My baby cousin is currently serving his mission in Tokyo actually, and I get super fascinated with all the pictures my aunt posts on Facebook. Gotta see it!
8. Go on a cruise: I've never been in one, and my parents say it's awesome. My sister went on one for her honeymoon and she really liked it too. I guess it's for the sake of trying it that I'd like to go on one.
9. Fly in a private airplane: I love flying! It'd be a fun adventure.
10. Swim in the dead sea: It floats people. And I'm a terrible swimmer. So it's a win-win!

I also love animals. I love them because they're innocent, most of them are cute, and it's interesting to see their different methods of survival from ours. And heck; they're God's creations! I want to appreciate some of the things He's made.

1. Pet a wild feline: Felines are the superior animals (on land) in my opinion. If you were to compare a cat to a dog, you'll see cats' bodies are way better designed for survival than dogs. The only advantage dogs have to cats are their mouths. But other than that, cats have good balance, speed, reflexes, perception, claws, and looks. They're also not noisy, stinky, clingy or slobbery like dogs. I love kitties! I love lions and tigers and I'd just love to cuddle with one or both of them someday. There's something about cuddling with a cute animal that puts me in a good mood. I hate dogs with passion though. There's some dogs who are smart and clean though so there's exceptions. But yes, I'd love to cuddle with a wild feline. They're just so graceful and yet strong and powerful at the same time.
2. Swim with dolphins: Dolphins are smart and cute. It looks like so much fun!
3. Go horse-back riding: I've done it, and it was uncomfortable. But I wanna do it again!
4. Ride an elephant: I can see myself panicking with the height and all that, but it's a fun thing to try at least once in your life.
5. Ride a camel: When I was 6 years old my family went on a trip to Morocco and I had the chance to ride a camel with my dad, but I chickened out and regret it to this day. Also, camels are cute!
6. Milk a cow: I'm random.

There's also a couple fun random stuff I'd like to do some time for entertainment purposes

1. Go in a hamster ball in the water
2. Go camping

So, I still had a list of skills and accomplishments on my bucket list. But this post is already super long, so stay tuned! What's on your bucket list? What are some things you'd like to try? It's important to set some random little fun items on your bucket list because life isn't just about the big things you accomplish. Those little things in life, like holding a baby, making friends, cuddling with a kitten, kicking a dog in the face, making a stranger on the street smile.. those little things put together are what bring happiness.

To deepen my explanation, I'll give you an example. A little boy is trying to raise money for a bike which costs $100. He starts off by starting a lemonade stand where he makes $30 before realizing he wouldn't make any more money than that as the fall season was approaching. He was happy, however, with each new customer and each extra cash added to his piggy bank. Then he learns to knit scarves and starts selling those. He makes another $50. Every scarf he sold made him feel super accomplished and happy. Then he washes his neighbors' cars and makes $30. Every neighbor that agreed to a car wash made him so happy! Notice how in this example he had numerous little instances of joy that together accumulated into his ability to afford a bike and pay tithing. Suppose he had sold his old video game for $100. It was just one joyful event. Sure, it got him $100. But he definitely would've appreciated his new bike a lot more with the first scenario than the second.

This is the same with life. Sometimes we're so focused on the big things (like getting a college degree, grad school, job, marriage, family, church callings, prizes, etc.) that we forget the little things in life. The strengthened faith and inspiration that comes from reading a chapter of the Book of Mormon, the warm fuzzy feelings after making someone's day a lot better and lifting their burdens, the joy of hugging a nephew or niece and hearing them tell you they love you, kissing your mom on the cheek, eating a cupcake, taking a walk in a colourful garden on a sunny day, listening to our favourite song, taking a nap, or feeling beautiful after getting your hair done. Those little things put together are what make us happy. This is why they say that accomplishing great things after a lot of hard work is far more rewarding than accomplishing great things after someone simply handed them to you -- because of the little things they had to do all piled up to get there.

That quote by President Uchtdorf was from his "Forget me not" talk in October 2011 at the Relief Society meeting. I would definitely recommend reading it, because it was really inspiring and I felt the spirit as I read it which can only mean that the words he said were true! Yup, I know everything He said are exactly what God or Jesus would say if they were here. He's an apostle called by God to say these words which I know to be true. So read, read, read!