Hi everyone!
I apologize for the delay. I usually make my posts every Friday and
last Friday I ended up going to Lethbridge for the weekend and I didn’t take my
laptop. Then when I came back it was all just a crazy busy week! And when I did
have time, I just lacked inspiration. It’s funny though. I’ve already written
over three posts to be revised before published, but I just lack the
inspiration to revise it and add or remove ideas to make it perfect, you know?
So I know I owe you guys the final post to the guarding your heart
series. It’s written, but, I don’t know. For some reason I’m just not feeling
inspired to revise it and make a post about it when it’s not really on my mind.
So I made another post, which was kind of a rant, and it’s written, but I was
also lacking the inspiration to proceed. So basically I have 5 posts written
and saved on my files here that just need some tweeking before getting posted.
And yet, I haven’t published them. Why? Well, when I write something and
publish it on the internet, I wanna feel what I write. I want what’s on my mind
and on my heart to reflect on my writings. And honestly, I’m really not feeling
it to talk about guarding your heart. Maybe next week. So that being said, I’m
interrupting it to talk about something else.
So my best friend’s mother-in-law shared a status her friend made (so
the credits don’t go to me at all), but I thought I’d copy and paste it here
because it’s good advice all girls and women should hear.
Here goes:
“TEN THINGS TO SAY TO YOUR TEENAGE DAUGHTER/NIECE/GIRL:
1. If you choose to wear shirts that show off your boobs, you will attract boys. To be more specific, you will attract the kind of boys that like to look down girls’ shirts. If you want to date a guy who likes to look at other girls’ boobs and chase skirts, then great job; keep it up. If you don’t want to date a guy who ogles at the breasts of other women, then maybe you should stop offering your own breasts up for the ogling. All attention is not equal. You think you want attention, but you don’t. You want respect. All attention is not equal.
2. Don’t go to the tanning bed. You’ll thank me
when you go to your high school reunion and you look like you’ve been
airbrushed and then photoshopped compared to the tanning bed train wrecks
formerly known as classmates – well, at least next to the ones that haven’t
died from skin cancer.
3. When you talk about your friends “anonymously”
on Facebook, we know exactly who you’re talking about. People are smarter than
you think they are. Stop posting passive-aggressive statuses about the myriad
of ways your friends disappoint you.
4. Newsflash: the number of times you say “I hate
drama” is a pretty good indicator of how much you love drama. Non-dramatic
people don’t feel the need to discuss all the drama they didn’t start and
aren’t involved in.
5. “Follow your heart” is probably the worst advice
ever.
6. Never let a man make you feel weak or inferior
because you are an emotional being. Emotion is good; it is nothing to be
ashamed of. Emotion makes us better – so long as it remains in its proper
place: subject to truth and reason.
7. Smoking is not cool.
8. Stop saying things like, “I don’t care what
anyone thinks about me.” First of all, that’s not true. And second of all, if
it is true, you need a perspective shift. Your reputation matters – greatly.
You should care what people think of you.
9. Don’t play coy or stupid or helpless to get
attention. Don’t pretend something is too heavy so that a boy will carry it for
you. Don’t play dumb to stroke someone’s ego. Don’t bat your eyelashes in
exchange for attention and expect to be taken seriously, ever. You can’t have
it both ways. Either you show the world that you have a brain and passions and
skills, or you don’t. There are no damsels in distress managing corporations,
running countries, or managing households. The minute you start batting
eyelashes, eyelashes is all you’ve got.
10. You are beautiful. You are enough. The world we
live in is twisted and broken and for your entire life you will be subjected to
all kinds of lies that tell you that you are not enough. You are not thin
enough. You are not tan enough. You are not smooth, soft, shiny, firm, tight,
fit, silky, blonde, hairless enough. Your teeth are not white enough. Your legs
are not long enough. Your clothes are not stylish enough. You are not educated
enough. You don’t have enough experience. You are not creative enough.
There is a beauty industry, a fashion industry, a
television industry, (and most unfortunately) a pornography industry: and all
of these have unique ways of communicating to bright young women: you are not
beautiful, sexy, smart or valuable enough.
You must have the clarity and common sense to know
that none of that is true. None of it.
You were created for a purpose, exactly so. You
have innate value. You are loved more than you could ever comprehend; it is
mind-boggling how much you are adored. There has never been, and there will
never be another you. Therefore, you have unique thoughts to offer the world.
They are only yours, and we all lose out if you are too fearful to share them.
You are beautiful. You are valuable. You are enough.”
I’d like to send a special shout-out to whoever it was that wrote this.
I hope whoever wrote it has a teenage daughter and/or is in a leadership
position. We need more women who think like that. We need more women who are
confident enough not to compromise their standards, their inner beauty, their
integrity, their self-respect, their love for themselves, or their image to
others. We need more women who are proud to be smart, who are kind, who set
goals for themselves and strive to reach them. We need more women who don’t
constantly seek for attention in order to feel good about themselves. We need
women who understand what true beauty is and pursue that kind of beauty. We
need women who stand up for what they know to be right, who aren’t afraid to
express their beliefs without being overbearing, and who are sincere.
These 10 things made me reflect on the kind of person I want to be and
what I’m doing right now to be that person. So, I’m gonna keep setting goals
for myself! I wanna be the kind of woman who follows these 10 things so that
when motherhood knocks on my door I can teach my daughter(s) through my
example. I know I’m not perfect. In fact, I’m far from it. But I also know
people can change and improve if they work towards it.
Anyways, those are my thoughts until the next post!
Love,
Miss Mottola
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